Sunday, December 5, 2010

My Little Magpie

First it was my wallet.  Not just any wallet, but a really cool silver card case with scrolls etched into it.  I found it at White House|Black Market a few years ago and it's been my favorite ever since.  Missing for almost an entire week, my husband found it buried inside a bag of birdseed in our laundry room.

Then there's the chest of drawers.  When last I checked, the very bottom drawer was empty, with no trace of its former neatly folded sheets.  The drawer right above it held a toy tow truck, a banana-shaped baby toothbrush, and a can of chicken noodle soup (with egg noodles).

Dinobaby is getting into evvvvvverything.



Phone chargers and the battery charger for his baby monitors disappear the most often.  He thinks that they're phones for some reason and runs around the house in his little diaper, socks, and t-shirt with the charging unit against his ear and the wire tail trailing along behind him.  "HI?"  "HI!"

He also likes getting 'toys' out of the kitchen cabinets.  Lids are great for sliding against the floor tiles to make a funny noise.  The sieve can double as a hat or face mask (perhaps fencing and/or beekeeping are in his future?).  Measuring cups are fun to beat on with baby spoons.

I went to change out the clothes in the dryer last night after both of the guys fell asleep.  Not that I ever just leave clothes in the dryer and fish out whatever I need instead of folding things and putting them away.  Ahem.  I opened the dryer and started to transfer things into a hamper when I saw something shiny in between the socks and undies.  It was a spatula.  Thankfully, I'm pretty sure it got in there after the clothes were dry.

My husband caught Dinobaby washing his hands in the toilet last week, too. 

I'm sure you're thinking, "Why don't those idiots just babyproof their house?"  Well, we have.  Obviously, not as well as we thought we did.  We have cabinet locks and a brand new toilet lock.  A lock for the stove is on the grocery list as he's figured out that if you put both hands on the oven door's handle and pretend that you're on the monkey bars, it opens just like magic!  The kid's getting infinitely closer to being able to turn door knobs as well, so I keep praying that I'm fast enough to catch him before he locks himself in a room by mistake.

It's pretty funny 99.9% of the time, even if it's equally frustrating 99.8% of the time.  He's curious and persistent, inquisitive and adventurous.  The only thing he's afraid of is a stethoscope.

We hadn't actually experienced the not-at-all funny 0.1% until earlier tonight.  I wanted to use up the entire bunch of overripe frozen bananas that were crowding my freezer, so I found this lovely recipe for banana bread over at Tasty Kitchen (check out meeshiesmom's related blog post). 

I opened up the pantry to find some Pam for Baking which, by the way, I could sit and spray into the air and smell all day long.  It's like a mix of funnel cake smell and canned vanilla frosting.  Mmmm.  Anyway, in the couple minutes it took for me to get the Pam, find my loaf pan and a muffin tin, spray the things, and inhale the lingering frostingfunnelcake particles, Dinobaby had defeated the gauntlet blocking his entrance to the kitchen and fished out a bottle of Izze from the pantry floor. 

I looked down at him and realized that he was holding a glass bottle and he smiled up at me with his big brown eyes twinkling.  Immediately, I moved to take it away from him, knowing full well what could happen. 

Then, of course, it did happen. 

He dropped the bottle onto the tile floor and it absolutely shattered.


Thankfully he was still for the two seconds it took for me to step close enough to pick him up.  He was un-phased.  My husband swept him out of the kitchen to clean up his feet and legs just in case.  Did I mention that I was barefoot?

My pinkie toe was only slightly injured -- "It's just a flesh wound!" -- and Dinobaby was safe and sound with no shards of glass whatsoever.  The floor still needs vacuuming to pick up the tinier pieces that I wasn't able to see, but it was under control relatively fast.  It was kind of frightening, but things turned out alright.

Though it is kind of interesting to have proof that I'd happily walk across broken glass for my child.